It was all going so well. I'd proudly got to the point where I'd lost 15% of my weight in less than 3 months. Currently, I'm 90% sure I've piled most of this back on.
I'm strange when it comes to habits or addictions. Some, I can just stop, purely because I decide to, but this one, just seems beyond me right now. Yes, it's definitely easier / better doing this as a group, the trouble is, I'm the main motivator of my group. So when my motivation goes, everything grinds to a halt.
I'm not the sort of person who responds to general encouragement, I find it awkward and embarrassing, and someone yelling at me bootcamp style makes me want to punch that "sergeant" in the face, so that doesn't work either. My type of encouragement comes from doing tasks with people taking part who are in the same position as me, or share the same motivations. I expect to be judged when I fail, so I'd rather share my failures with people I know have the same failures and aren't going to be dicks about it. I'd imagine it's the same for them. It's a precarious scenario though. Similarity breeds success, but it also can snowball into a shared failure just as easily.
And that's pretty much what's happened. No one weighed in one week, none of us said anything about it and we haven't weighed in since. I'm not going to call it a failure, as I it's unfair of me to speak on behalf of the others, but I think it's safe to say we've all fallen off the bandwagon to varying degrees.
So, what's next? Well, I'm feeling pretty crappy about it and I want to reignite the whole thing so that my month 4 report isn't so gloomy. I think I need to get more creative about the motivational thing. I have no idea how I'm going to do this mind you, but I'll let you know how it goes.
This Friday there'll be a weigh in and if it's utterly horrible, then I'm just going to have to fix it, one way or another.